Instructor Sheryl Baber Evans

Sifu Sheryl Baber Evans has been training in the art of Chinese Kempo Karate since 1992. In addition to her third degree black belt in Chinese Kempo Karate, she also holds a third degree black belt in Kajukenbo and is the first American woman to receive a black belt in Modern Arnis from Dr. Remy Presas Jr. Her experience with children include an associate's degree in early childhood education, over 5 years of professional experience in that field and two children of her own. She also brings to her classes training from yoga, brazilian jujitsu and tai chi. Ever since her picture was taken out of focus, the photographer has been missing. Coincidence? Hmm...

Leave the Ladies Sewing Circle
by Ms. Sheryl Baber Evans
At the age of nineteen I found myself in a position no woman wants to be in. My four-year relationship with my boyfriend had become a world of fear and pain. John grew from a young confused adolescent to an angry and spiteful man. This behavior was not immediate, it started out as simple teasing and light putdowns and gradually progressed through the years to the slow and painful process of stripping away my spiritual strength. By the time the beatings started I was terrified and alone in my pain. I finally found the strength to leave the situation, but I was the walking wounded for years. I was frustrated with my continuous avoidance of verbal conflict because I feared it would lead to violence. I became determined that I would not become a victim of violence ever again. I decided that all women need to leave behind the idea that men are superior to them and empower themselves by strengthening their self-esteem, learn how to defend themselves, and empower other women so they would not become victims too.

Women should strengthen their self-esteem mentally and physically. A Dear Abby column would suggest to a woman with my history to get therapy to regain my self-esteem, but I learned that there are two kinds of therapy. The Dear Abby therapy involves speaking with a psychologist, and verbally rehashing personal nightmares. Then there is a form of physical therapy called self-defense, which can help a person gain the assertiveness needed to stop the nightmare before it happens. I have done both, and I have found that while verbal therapy does help, what empowered me the most was learning how to defend myself mentally and physically.

Unfortunately, learning to gain assertiveness physically and emotionally is unknown territory for many women because they are brought up to behave like ladies who are polite, nurturing and are fed the belief that men's feelings are more important than their own. This type of mentality sets women up as helpless and vulnerable (Guidebook 5).

Muggers and abusers look for victims who appear to be easy prey. They look for a woman who appears to be distracted, unaware or worse shrinks in on herself in public. Therefore, women need to be aware that their body language speaks volumes about their mentality. By walking with a firm step, standing tall and being unafraid to look someone in the eye takes mental strength to be believable ("Guidebook" 5). As a karate instructor, I often tell students, "The first step to avoid becoming a victim is by not acting like one." As a small woman who is barely five feet tall, I grew up feeling that my short stature was my biggest weakness until I started training in a martial art. After months of physical training, I realized my biggest weakness was self-doubt. I have since learned that to be physically complete in assertiveness training, you have to be mentally ready as well.

Yet, no matter how vulnerable a woman may feel she still has the right to defend herself. To embrace that empowerment, a women needs training. Training can include basic self-defense seminars, practical martial arts, or even combat training.

Many women do not realize local law enforcement agencies acknowledge and support the practice of self-defense. Some critics have said that women who learn self-defense are setting themselves up to be injured further or give them a sense of overconfidence, yet studies show otherwise (Beaumont 22). Police records have shown that by using self-defense, women can and do resist rape and other assaults successfully. Studies revealed that 44% of 600 women avoided rape by using either physical force or verbal statements to avoid an assault. Of all acquaintance rapes, 80% percent were diverted through assertiveness and verbal resistance (Guidebook 4).

Self-defense is definitely not flying through treetops as seen in martial arts movies. It is however, learning to be aware of your surroundings. Awareness is about paying attention. Much of this awareness is really just a common-sense approach to every day life, for many women this is known as instinct. Unfortunately, I commonly see women ignore instinct and walk out into the dark with a cell phone stuck to their ear, totally oblivious of any potential disasters. These careless ladies may as well have a sign on their back that says "easy target, take me now." I am not suggesting that women should walk in fear on a daily basis, in fact it is just the opposite. What I am suggesting is that by taking an assertive approach to life they may actually save it. The key to adjusting this behavior is to create a consistency of personal safety habits and the deliberate effort to apply those habits in the "absence of perceived danger" (Guidebook 1). But self-defense is not just about awareness; it is a gold key that opens a door leading to personal empowerment and the safety to release the inner tiger when in danger.

Martial arts training is not just learning how to use that inner tiger. It is a form of a mental and physical discipline with the added benefit of physical conditioning. The meditative aspects of training, produces a profound attitude change through focus and determination (Cardoza 39). Through the instructor, the student can eventually create a mindset that each of the movements learned is teaching proper techniques to instill instinctive reflex. Through the use of voice, kicks, punches, weapons instruction, grappling techniques, and contact sparring the student learns the philosophy of empowerment not based on strength but by using their assets against an assailants weaknesses (Guidebook 6).

A practical martial arts instructor will tell students not only how to perform a technique, but why they are performing it. Some schools avoid teaching various linear combinations of techniques called forms because it is their belief that they are for show only, yet each move in a form represents a reaction to a grab, kick or strike from more than one opponent (Cardoza 73). Even learning the basics of blocks and punches helps students understand how the body works, moves and feels. Unfortunately, all of this training can be considered worthless unless contact sparring and weapons instruction is permitted. If a student is not taught how every block is a strike, and every strike is a block feels when they are training, they will not be prepared for the painful strike outside the school.

Combat training is a practical, no-nonsense approach to survival on the streets. Many of the students who attend this type of training include people in the military and law enforcement. As a part of their duty, these specially-trained students have to be prepared to defend themselves in a quick and deadly manner. Critics of this kind of training who use the old excuse that one bullet and all of that training will mean nothing, have never stepped into a combat training school. Students are trained how to fight and defend with knives, short sticks, and even guns. Paralleling practical martial arts, students are taught that going into a fight does not mean that they are invincible: if there is a knife involved, plan on being cut; if there is a stick involved, plan on getting hit; if there is a gun involved, plan on getting shot. Yet, with this type of training, these students at least are a step ahead of their attacker by knowing what to do to in this type of situation, even if it means being trained to kill efficiently and aggressively. Many women take combat training because survival means learning to do the unthinkable, even if that means biting a knife wielding rapist's finger to the bone. When it comes down to survival, women will have to fight fiercely and to the death, and must be more brutal and savage than men if they want to stay alive (Guidebook 3).

With the knowledge I have learned in self-defense classes, martial arts and some combat training, it is my responsibility to share it with the community. Sure I could have walked away with my black belt in karate as my prize, but I could never walk away from those who needed my knowledge. When I see a young woman in my karate class start to gain confidence in her new abilities, I know that she too has accepted the right to be strong and is building a strong spirit. Piecing together spirit is the first ingredient of self-defense. It enables all of the other ingredients including physical fitness, defense tactics and focus to be effective (Guidebook 3).

As instructors, sometimes we have to demonstrate a point in class. So my 170-pound instructor/husband steps into my 110-pound space and yells into my face effectively scaring the whole class. In a focus of adrenaline, I hit him with the heel of my palms just below the shoulder blades and yell, "BACK OFF!" In awe the students see Chief Instructor Andrew fly halfway across the room. The lesson is learned. Never underestimate the power of a woman.

Beaumont, Ned. Championship Streetfighting Boxing as a Martial Art. Boulder, CO: Paladin Press, 1997.

Cordoza, Monica McCabe, A Woman's Guide to Martial Arts and How to Choose a Discipline and Get Started. Woodstock, NY: Overlook Press, 1996.

A Personal Safety Guidebook, A Practical Guide on Thoughts and Techniques On How to Avoid Becoming a Victim of Assault. (Washburn University Police), 2002.

Below are comments regarding Sifu Sheryl's essay...
"I just read your story about being in an abusive relationship. I too went through that and that is how I got into martial arts. My ex boyfriend was physically abusive and I had believed the lie that men are superior to women. I couldn't handle being abused any more. A friend introduced me to a women who is a tae know doe expert. She was willing to train me privately for free.

After learning self defense techniques for a few weeks, I was confident that I could defend myself against that man. The next time that he tried to harm me, I fought back and WON! As he tried to punch at me, I blocked it, putting his arm against his chest. cranked him across the face then KICKED HIM SQUARE IN THE NUTS! He was then in agony. I told him to leave and never come back. He never messed with me again.

Today I am a black belt instructor. I have taught women at the work place how to defend themselves and one women successfully used those skills that I taught her against a man who was sexually harrassing her one night as she was walking home.

I have also taught my 2 daughters the martial arts. I am now married to a wonderful man and he is very supportive of me being into martial arts. He's not into it, but he has no problem with me being into it and it doesn't bother him that I could whoop his butt."

Sifu Sheryl in action!